KL

Land of Mega malls

Ingrid Michaelson

What if we stop having a ball?
What if the paint chips from the wall?
What if there´s always cups in the sink?
What if I´m not what you think I am?

What if I fall further than you?
What if you dream of somebody new?
What if I never let you win, chase
you with a rolling pin?
Well what if I do?

I am giving up on making passes and
I am giving up on half empty glasses and
I am giving up on greener grasses
I am giving up

What if our baby comes home after nine?
What if your eyes close before mine?
What if you lose yourself sometimes?
Then I´ll be the one to find you
Safe in my heart

I am giving up on making passes and
I am giving up on half empty glasses and
I am giving up on greener grasses
I am giving up

I am giving up
I am giving up
I am giving up on greener grasses

I am giving up for you
I am giving up for you
I am giving up

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hs5PjSn1-iI&feature=related

Inside out

For dinner, I am going to have BK's steakhouse burger, onion rings, coke and Hershey's chocolate pie. mmmmmmmmm...... Am so very hungry for I skipped lunch today, nursing my sore throat in bed.

When you learn something that you didn't know about someone you've known all your life (and thought you knew everything there was to know about), I must say, you are rather surprised.

Inspired

New bright and shiny long-term goal.

Extra-Terrestial

Lent my sis my awesome Travel Packing List to pack for Hongkong.

Grandma on sister's new tights:
"Wah you buy Rubber Pants ah!! So tight!"
Hahaha

I can understand why patients have compliance issues with their meds. It is really troublesome to have to dab Bethamethasone on my 101 mozzie bites TWICE a day and waiting for the steroid to be absorbed into my circulation before sitting down, and Atarax makes me super drowsy and induces a dream-like state.

My Indian friend just told me that he is working in a shipyard now, "in Bangla overalls". Funny guy.

School

olleez.(Oli) says:
valproate is used in treating bipolar
(me) says:
orlistat is used for treating obesity

HAHAHA.

During lectures, when we are bored, we play hangman with the category Microbiology. Excellent fun with long words : _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ (Neisseria meningitidis) My friends took very long to guess this one. :D

At home, when we are bored, we do stupid fb quizzes such as "What microorganism are you?" and "Which debilitating disease are you?" I cannot believe that I am necrotizing fasciitis- that is really cool but it's a realllly bad one to get.

Sigh........ MicroB is making us less sane and frying my mind.

I've an awesome new alarm clock which is really loud, really pretty, can snooze many times, has a sweeping second hand and the whole thing glows in the dark. :D I will try not to smack it too hard in my semi-awakeness so that it will last me longer than its ancestors have.

"You owe me bubble tea"

My friend just told me the most hilarious story about getting stalked. It made my night. I would like to tell the story here, but I think he would kill me. Have not laughed so much in a long time!

Anyway I passed CA, and not too badly. ((: Praise God, for He is wonderful. My light, my strength and my song.

Sloth

Impending rain with its telltale grey skies and lightning helps me to focus. It relaxes me and clears my mind so that I am able to think about measles and vaccination. Still, there is much to be desired of my recent unmotivation and unacceptable sloth. At the back of my mind, I am furious, yes, furious with myself for allowing myself to descend into this soul-sucking spiral. I want to be worthy of it, and I resolve to make up for these past weeks with fervour.

Jesus teach me to pray

Done on velvet by a Viet artist.

Luke 22:39-46
Jesus went out as usual to the Mount of Olives, and his disciples followed him. On reaching the place, he said to them, "Pray that you will not fall into temptation." He withdrew about a stone's throw beyond them, knelt down and prayed, "Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will, but yours be done." An angel from heaven appeared to him and strengthened him. And being in anguish, he prayed more earnestly, and his sweat was like drops of blood falling to the ground.

When he rose from prayer and went back to the disciples, he found them asleep, exhausted from sorrow. "Why are you sleeping?" he asked them. "Get up and pray so that you will not fall into temptation."

Colourblind

I forgot how to go home from Parkway today. Was standing at the bus stop with my og, looking at the list of buses on the notice board and feeling puzzled that there was no bus 55. It was probably my 367th time at Parkway, having gone for many Sakae buffets there while at VJ, many lunches during long breaks, countless dinners after school.... and I forgot how to go home and took a roundabout route in the end. I was curious to see if J remembers the route home so I asked him, and obviously, predictably, he does.

Showed my friends my favourite spot and stretch of lane at ECP- it's beautiful.

Oh and I climbed my first tree today! (:

Augustina in October

Love seeing my grandmother, resplendent in her ruffled collars, vintage buttons and pretty florals, and emitting the fragrance of perfume that was a gift from me. And teasing her about her brown pants looking orange.

((:

And telling her that my CA is on Friday a few times a day and having her tell me that I'm repetitive.

Sink or swim

This madness started with a fellow fan sending me a clip on fb: Grey's Anatomy returns to ABC! I got caught up with all the latest Grey's news this morning (including how Katherine Heigl is going to adopt a Korean baby girl and Eric Dane's porn name if you're curious would be Tuff Hedemen). And watched the sneak preview of season 6- the first 5 mins of episode 1!!! (As well as all the promo sneaks) The show premieres on Sept 24 (14 days before CA unfortunately) and I am so excited!

Right. Back to VDJ Recombination and how antibodies are made.

You are beautiful beyond description

And I stand, I stand in awe of you
I stand, I stand in awe of you
Holy God to whom all praise is due
I stand in awe of you.

Refuel me

Tonight I offer up a prayer for you, that God's tender love may ease the pain of losing someone so dear, that He may enable you to see beyond unfulfilled aspirations and dashed hopes of months past and open your eyes to the bigger better plans that He has for you. You may feel broken, but He will make you whole and disperse the darkness. May you be surrounded with friends and sunshine every day.

A hypertensive day

I see my reflection in the laptop's reflective screen and I laugh. Although it moves when I laugh so I try not to. It's really a strange sight. I'm wearing a face mask that C gave me (my first time using such products). Anws I went into the living room to try to scare my sis after I patted the mask into place. Unfortunately my mom commented on it and thus my sis did not get a shock. Sigh.

Today was a day that got my blood pressure up on more occasions than one.

PHS: I was paired with an M5 who was holding consultations and my job was to assist him. It was really a pleasure working with this lovely lovely M5. He asked permission from every single patient to let me take their blood pressure and lent me his stet to do so. He silently positioned the stet correctly when I used the bell instead of the diaphragm. When I made mistakes, he would beam at the patient and said in his encouraging manner, "We are all learning", covering my embarrassment. When I could not get the correct readings, he assured me that the patient's pulse pressure was really soft (it was true-he wasn't just trying to make me feel better) or that that particular BP was really hard to get. He gave me a tutorial in between patients and let me practise on him though the patients were piling up. When I got him a cup of milk from the free Omega 3 milk booth, he drank it despite his beliefs that milk increases the risk of osteoporosis (which he preached to the patients but I failed to hear as I was trying to master taking BP in my mind haha).

When I become a senior in the clinics, this is the kind that I want to be. (:

Oh! Time to remove the mask!!

And I will remember this day for more reasons than one. ;)

Light me up

You know it's bad when the bacteria with their coated complement look like aliens landing on their spaceship (the macrophage) and your mind is so far away in outerspace and it fails to return to the lt no matter how hard you summon it. Kinda like aliens have abducted your grey matter.

Here I am again, sitting in the dark with only my table lamp as my room's sole source of light. The light blew last night and it's not been fixed. Tell me, how to start preparing for tutorial like that? Note to self: Buy Mama Robbins, Abbas (?), and Pharmaco and MicroB. Note to self II: Winter's belated birthday celebration

I remember running on the all too familiar SN track to the beat of the Band or CO, whichever were having practice that day. One of the random thoughts that came to mind while I was running just now. Anyway I've been pretty proud of myself for an achievement and I thank God for giving me the strength- almost a month now. So Note to self III: Keep it up

Don't tell me it's not worth fighting for

That song is stuck in my head.

Today I fluttered my eyelashes at so many people (at their requests) and now my eyelids are feeling tired and relatively immobile. Haha my levators palpebrae superioris are probably not used to the workload! In fact, I think they are experiencing some muscle ache now.

Winter turns 5

Designed by a friend. (:


Best dog in the world:
Knows how to open doors (that are already ajar)
Knows how to knock politely and then persistently on my door
Squeaks while having happy dreams
Insists on getting a hug every time I come home
Snatches ham from people's hands and gobbles it up in two seconds (though she's allergic)
Spoils picnics by peeing on the mat
Jumps off bicycles and gives me heart attacks
Afraid of the waves. And thunder and rain and cats
Not interested in having any doggie friends despite having many suitors
Embarrasses me by growling at waiters

Happy Birthday silly Sweetpea

Eyes that mesmerize

First week of M2 is over. Rag, watched Up, learnt from a President's scholar cum MBBS with honours Paeds cum geneticist lecturer (!!!) in a tiny LT, one study session that wasnt very successful in the library, ys's birthday, Arts fair, seeing the M1s getting settled into school, a most memorable OG lunch at Aston's- we were seated in a long long row tucking into yummy food when it suddenly started raining, settling CG that everyone has been talking about for some time now- am happy with the arrangement. That about sums up my week, leaving me with a huge pile of readings to do for the weekend. A good week, despite my being sick and not very speedy recovery. I think I'd hafta make another trip down to UHWC (sigh) for some amoxicillin as it's clearly bacterial, having lasted a week.

So off I go to increase my knowledge in leukemia, Down's, single gene defects, AD/AR/XLR.............. before I head down to church and Chomp Chomp with BFFs! (:

Pokerface

School starts tmrw. Officially M2. There's no honeymoon week like last year though, tmrw we dive straight into the unfamiliar world of genetics and genomics. I'm happy and excited but I don't think I can handle the usual 4 lectures/ day cuz I've come down with a terrible bout of URTI. Of cuz I wish the holidays were longer. But still. Happy (:

There's nothing more I would ask

I'm back from Bali, the land of beautiful sunsets and unbelievable beaches (more about the beaches later). Today, I was walking toward Ikea Tampines when I saw an amazing sight! In the middle of the sky coloured in hues of pink, orange and purple, there was a perfectly round glowing red ball, completely unobscured by clouds. You say duh, that's the Sun! But that glowing ball looked so 3-dimensional and so near that I stood near the overhead bridge for awhile, thinking that it must be a lantern and not the Sun! This is not as silly as it seems as there was one lantern hanging in the distance near the Sun. Haha. I continued my journey to Ikea, looking at this glowing ball all the while and finally concluded that it had to be the Sun, though I've never seen it looking like this before.

The beaches in Bali are beautiful. My particular favourite among those that I've visted is Legian Beach, at which our hotel was located. When I fell sick nearing the end of our trip, I wore a mask and rented an umbrella lounge chair. The next day I felt better and I sat on the sand, lost in the music of the ocean, the thrill of the waves rushing towards shore and my feet and the feel of the soft soft sand. My feet would start to sink into this soft soft sand. It was most surprising that as I walked along the beach, words just came to me and formed a song! It is really hard to describe my attachment to the place, hard to say how it refreshed my soul, and how I long to be back there.




My slippers and the heart that I drew (:

):

Feel like crap tonight.

Addicted

to Kinder Bueno! Good for a snack while watching Grandma cook, while watching tv, when you get hungry watching House, before you leave the house....... I ate especially many during the Pros mugging period.

And I just spied a huge container of freshly-made salad in my fridge yum :D

Picnic

On Monday we lay under a canopy of leaves for hours, listening to Sapphire and other more noisy songs that my friends favour. There was a great view of the river, a gentle breeze and the occasional fisherman. The patterns of the leaves against the sky were beautiful; I regretted not bringing my sketchbook. The soothing sound of nature, the absolute calmness that made each nerve in our bodies relax would have lulled us to sleep if not for my friends' friendly bickering and our conversation about anything that came to our minds.

The Holiday

Mom's making salad now after we all commented on how yummy it was the last time she prepared it as a side dish with her signature steak. Yesterday I learnt how to cook aglio olio! Pretty easy actually, just have to take the pasta out at exactly the right time, and move fast when it comes to the garlic and other spices part.

It feels strangely different to have so much time on my hands. With absolutely nothing to do except attending picnics, thinking about exercising (swam 30 laps on Thursday but have been stagnant ever since), clearing my room, trip planning, watching House-episode after episode of sarcasm and differential diagnoses.....

Ashamed to admit that I've spent my day amusing myself by blocking my dog's way haha

Only little more than a month before M2 begins, have just taken a look at the timetable which looks awfully packed, but exciting nonetheless.

I've got a swelling in the cartilage of my right ear, I dunno what it is but it looks like the cartilage broke but I dont think cartilage can break. Gonna get it checked out soon!

House

Awfully cute, Dr Chase is.



I adore his accent and I like the way he dresses.


Chase: I was in seminary school. They asked us once what our favorite passage was. I chose 1 Peter 1:7. “These trials only test your faith to see whether or not it is strong and pure. Your faith is being tested as fire tests gold and purifies it."

Augustine: “And your faith is far more precious to the Lord than pure gold; so if your faith remains strong after being tested, it will bring you much praise and glory and honor on the day of His return.”

I Love the hols

Making plans for thursday's sleepover now! Scrambled eggs and cupcakes and old friends sound happy.

We baked in the sun today and listened to the waves (and the sound of construction of a chalet nearby)

Now or never

I just finished watching the finale of season 5 of grey's anatomy. Wow. This show takes my breath away. I'm not gonna do a review on it cuz I know I won't do it justice, but truly the only thing that's not right about grey's is that the doctors wear their stethoscopes front to back, and that they don't fix their elbows while doing chest compressions. But still, awesome. (: Great after-pros entertainment. Next up, private practice!

Random thoughts

H is sending me songs now (: Clinicals tmrw ((:

CA's ended and it's about 7 weeks to Pros.

I've finished watching 5 seasons of Grey's now (till the latest episode). Just promised O that I'd get him a golliwog for his birthday.

Tried this shrimp flavoured spicy Korean instant noodles that my friend highly recommended. It has a nice flavour.

I do not like being late for school even by a few minutes, running in the rain to the LT and missing 5 minutes of the lecture the way I did today.

I just did a 'What is your meant-to-be job?' quiz on fb and the result is Artist. Why oh why is it always artist when I take these sort of quizzes? For the question 'What is your favourite subject in school?' I chose Science over Art! (Although I really liked Art too)

Need to exercise.

Need to sleep.

He makes all things new

Today's sermon:

Many of us are unhappy. We are weighed down. We attribute this unhappiness to physical things, such as the lack of sufficient money and other material things, the people around us etc. As a result, we try to acquire more material things, we spend our time trying to get a more aesthetic body shape, we seek revenge and so on, thinking that these things will make us happy.

But the reason we are unhappy is not because we are unhappy about our jobs, about money, or about others. We are unhappy with ourselves. We are dissatisfied with ourselves. All of us sin. Sin is one reason that makes us unhappy. We do terrible things, bad things, we have hurt others, we have done things that are shameful and disgusting. We are ashamed of ourselves and we try to hide our sins. We push them away and pretend that we did not do these things because we can't face them. We can't face ourselves. We hate ourselves. We can't forgive ourselves, much less forget our sins. Why can't we forgive ourselves? Because we do not believe that God can forgive us! We do not really believe in God's forgiveness and healing, that He can make all things new. We believe that God can do many physical things such as let us win 4D, but we do not truly believe that God can forgive us completely, because we can't forgive ourselves. But God is faithful to us, He keeps His promises.

The sacrament of reconciliation is so important. Yet we are often not sincere in our confessions, sometimes we can't even remember our list of sins. We need to be sincere in reconciling ourselves with God, and realize that God is forgiving and loving and He will forgive us completely when we are sincere. Otherwise, we are not ready for reconciliation. We are unhappy because we cannot let go of our past, we cling on to our past. It is only when we have allowed God to forgive us that we are liberated, set free and no longer will we look at others with hatred, but with compassion and sympathy.

The other reason why we are unhappy is because of the people, especially our loved ones- our spouses, our parents, our friends, who have hurt us and abandoned us. A husband who has left us, friends that have abandoned us, parents who have hurt us. Our loved ones have hurt us so deeply, and no one knows how painful it is. The hurt and pain are so immense and all-consuming that we cannot go forward. We just can't move on. We can't forgive. We try our best to forget, not to think about these painful events, but we are so broken. We need God's emotional and spiritual healing. Ask God sincerely to heal your soul and He definitely will heal you this evening and you will be set free.

We need to forgive ourselves and to forgive others. Make peace with God, make peace with yourself and most importantly, make peace with the people whom you have hurt and who have hurt you. God will heal your soul and He will make all things new.


***


It is unfortunate that some meaning has been lost and impact changed with my inadequate phrasing but this is the gist of it- one of the most powerful encounters with God in my life. Today, He spoke directly to my heart and showed me that there is no greater love. Truly, I am happy.

Train of thought

Different people have different writing styles and expression. It reflects the tone of their thoughts and to an extent their personality as well.

Spent the day at the anat hall, thought that my chicken's ligaments and ?veins were a bit obvious, as a result did not have a very good dinner. Oh and today C and I were models for Prof Raj haha we posed in the anat museum trying to look intellectual (He was doing a presentation for foreigners)

I'm yearning to go to ECP and cycle to Changi Beach, have a picnic there, and cycle back. Went on Sat with Huis but cuz of insufficient time and other reasons (H, you know what they are eh) we made it to 8km from Changi :| Ah, the wind in my hair and the sun on my shoulders. Awesome

I have a small ball of cells inside my ear lobe. Please be benign. Haha should be la

Hi Salonshine

Learnt a bit about hermaphrodites today. Fascinating. My eyes and ears were wide awake though it was the 830 lecture.

Have no fear, my little one

Went to the Neonatal unit ytd, and to sum it up in a word- incredible.

The smallest sweet little baby was <5kg. We saw twins (25 weeks), a baby with necrotic bowel (NEC) that could not be resected and pitting oedema everywhere with shiny and some abdominal gangrene, another preemie and another wrinkly preemie and a few other preemies. They are tiny- the ribs can be counted. They struggle to breathe with their accessory muscles and are on oxygen. Some thrash about and wave their little 1mm wide fingers. One cried. Their diapers are about 6 sizes too big. There is a constant though variable beeping coming from the preemies' machines. Every detail from ventilation to breathing to blood gases, temperature, pH is looked after.

Except I was sick and had to wear a mask and it irritated my eyes. But still ((:

The next time we're going to ED and Paeds Onco (my suggestion) (:

You're leaving now? See you tomorrow

You've known me all my life. You played with me when I was young. You watched me grow up. You drive me around. You've seen the real me. You ask me about school, about my exams, my grades and these things matter to you. You urge me to be good, to study hard. You taught me right from wrong. You've lectured me. You make sure I have all that I need. You made up nicknames to call me. You fix things around the house. You put up with mom's ranting. You tease me about my painted nails. You looked after grandma when we were overseas. You keep my secrets. You listen, you don't judge when I talk to you. You supported me in a big way when I chose to study medicine. You care for us. You've celebrated every holiday with us. You love me like I'm your own.

Sometimes I wish you were my dad.

Still I'd find You there

My bathroom light blew so I hadta bathe in the dark just now.

Listening to this guy play his guitar and singing now, not bad I say.

Murderer

I just saw a fat lizard with beady black eyes in my kitchen. My stupid lizard traps don't work. What should I do? They make me paranoid, my heart jumps at the slightest noise. Why don't they like the lizard bait?? I think there are 2 of these nasty creatures in my house. One of them likes to swing on hanging plastic bags (thus I no longer eat breakfast) and the other lives by the dustbin.

I've done research on house lizards and apparently lizards are harmless and even beneficial cuz they eat bugs. But I hate the one that hangs on plastic bags. Wanted to pour hot water on the one by the dustbin the other night (Jen's advice).... went to my family for support on my decision, and they stared at me in horror and told me how much it would hurt and looked at me like I was a murderer. So, needless to say I didn't commit the murder.

Have been reading forums about them. They haunt me in my sleep.

On a much happier note, went church with Van and Tin today. Love em to bits!! (:

A Typical Day in the Life of a Student with Bad Time Management

There are only 24 hours in a day. Say school ends at 1. By the time I reach home it is 2. If I do some grocery shopping or other retail therapy at Vivo or get otherwise distracted on my way home, I may reach home at 3. When I've bathed and eaten lunch it's 4 (the typical day). Checking my email and being online for awhile and it's 5!! Time for tea. End of tea: 6pm. Then I go for a run. After my run (and maybe walking my dog after) and showering it's 8. Dinner till 9. Then finally finally, looking through lecture notes!

Where did all my time go? ): How can I keep my one and only New Year's Resolution if I start studying at 9?? I am terrible with time management. Haha

Macini

Today was my first time using a stethoscope on a real patient. My past experience consists of using Dr Kang and Loh's on my own chest and abdomen, and the patient simulator Harvey. And in the very pleasant elderly man, i heard Rhonchi!!

The cute old lady who talked a lot was really cute. And there was an interesting Malay man. All neuro patients.

Though it takes a lot of effort to be consistent in reading up, I'm so glad I'm studying this (: Esp when Oli's telling me about his 3 year old liver transplant girl born without a bile duct and his cerebral palsy guy.